How Long Does It Really Take to Build a Habit?
The Science Behind Behavior Change
How Long Does It Take to Form a Habit?
Guess.
Seriously.
How many days?
Most people think it’s 21 days or 3 weeks…
On average, it takes 66 days — or about 2 months — to form a habit. Note that the range is 18 to 254 days! WHAT!? Averages — especially when applied to people — are only a little helpful because everyone is so different and as you can tell from this range, you tend to lose the richness of the vast differences in human existence. More on this in a bit.
Our takeaway? It takes time to form a new, repeated and regular behavior.
According to one of our favorite books here at MYNDY, the Encyclopedia Britannica, a habit is: “A usual way of behaving: something that a person does often in a regular and repeated way.” We think of them as automatic behaviors.
We have good habits/behaviors, like: Grocery shopping on Sundays, putting our phone on airplane mode to do focused work, smiling and nodding when our boss, Susan, is talking, and brushing our teeth.
We also have habits/behaviors that challenge our ability to feel good each day, like: Hitting the snooze button (guilty), eating too many jalapeño chips before dinner (guilty), watching cake frosting YouTube videos while on a group Zoom (still guilty), and scrolling on Instagram for too long.
These are called “behavioral habits” — and they shape our days, weeks, fiscal quarters, and years. If you're curious about how those daily habits really add up, a fantastic article from the Greater Good Magazine by UC Berkeley beautifully explains how simple, consistent actions can lead to profound, lasting changes over time. It's truly inspiring to see the science behind the ripple effect of small efforts! (Greater Good Science Center, 2023).
While this makes sense, doing anything new is challenging. Why? Because creating new behaviors, even small ones, takes energy. And when we’re tired, we *literally* do not have energy to create these new behaviors.
So now, let’s talk about how this relates to mindset.
Did you know that we also have habits of feelings and thoughts? We have a lot of the same thoughts day to day — and many are negative. This might be because we have a bias toward negativity (scientists believe that it is because, evolutionarily speaking, these negative thoughts keep us alive to ensure we avoid threats to our survival). Or because we literally have more negative words to describe our feelings than positive ones in the average feelings wheel. Negative thoughts and feelings can be useful to identify things that are not working in our life. HOWEVER, if we let them become the pattern, or habit, we can have a pretty rough experience. Every. Single. Day.
So let’s dive into more detail on habits and how to shift them… so that we can get you feeling good!
The Elusive Nature of Habit Formation: Beyond the Myth of 21 Days
For decades, the notion that it takes a mere 21 days to form a habit has permeated self-help circles, pop psychology, and casual conversation. It’s an appealingly neat and achievable timeframe, offering a quick fix for those eager to overhaul their lives. However, as the initial text boldly states, this widely circulated number is, in fact, a myth. The reality, backed by scientific research, is far more nuanced and, frankly, a bit more challenging. The average habit formation period stretches to a significant 66 days, with a remarkable range extending from a swift 18 days to a more formidable 254 days. This vast variability underscores the individual nature of habit change, reminding us that there's no one-size-fits-all answer.
The origin of the 21-day myth can be traced back to Maxwell Maltz, a plastic surgeon in the 1950s. He observed that his patients took around 21 days to adapt to their new appearances after surgery. While his observations were valid for his patients, the generalization to all habits and behaviors was a leap that unfortunately stuck. Subsequent research, notably by Phillippa Lally and her team at University College London, delved deeper into the actual timeframes. Their study, published in the European Journal of Social Psychology, tracked the daily habits of 96 people over 12 weeks. The findings from this groundbreaking research provided the 66-day average, as well as the wide range, offering a more accurate and scientifically supported understanding of habit formation. This research highlights the complexity of human behavior and the numerous factors that influence how quickly, or slowly, a new pattern becomes automatic.
Understanding Habits: More Than Just Actions
The Britannica definition of a habit as "a usual way of behaving: something that a person does often in a regular and repeated way" captures the essence of automaticity. Habits are, at their core, behaviors that we perform without conscious thought or significant effort. They are shortcuts our brains create to conserve mental energy. Think about your morning routine: brushing your teeth, making coffee, checking your phone. These actions often flow seamlessly without explicit decision-making for each step.
While we often focus on behavioral habits, such as consistent exercise or mindful eating, it's crucial to acknowledge the equally powerful, yet often overlooked, categories of habits of feeling and thought. Our internal landscape – how we process emotions, the narratives we tell ourselves, and our default reactions to situations – is also governed by habitual patterns. The inclination towards negativity, as mentioned, is a prime example. This evolutionary bias served our ancestors well, prompting them to be wary of threats, but in modern life, it can lead to chronic anxiety and pessimism.
Shifting these ingrained mental and emotional habits presents a unique challenge. Unlike a physical action, which can be easily observed and tracked, thoughts and feelings are often fleeting and internal. This is where practices like mindfulness, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), breathwork, goal-setting, and journaling become invaluable tools. They provide mechanisms for us to become more aware of our internal patterns, challenge unhelpful thoughts, and consciously cultivate more positive emotional responses.
The Pillars of Habit Formation: Consistency, Context, and Cue-Reward Loops
Beyond the duration, several key principles underpin successful habit formation. Consistency is arguably the most critical factor. It's not about perfect execution every single day, but rather about showing up, even imperfectly, most of the time. Small, consistent efforts compound over time, building momentum and strengthening the neural pathways associated with the new behavior. Missing a day isn't the end of the world, but consistent lapses will derail progress.
Context also plays a significant role. Habits are often triggered by specific cues in our environment. Want to start exercising daily? Lay out your workout clothes the night before. Aiming to read more? Keep a book on your bedside table. By strategically designing our environment, we can make it easier to initiate desired behaviors and harder to succumb to old patterns. This concept is beautifully articulated in James Clear's "Atomic Habits," which emphasizes the power of designing your environment to make good habits inevitable and bad habits impossible. He introduces the "four laws of behavior change": make it obvious, make it attractive, make it easy, and make it satisfying.
Finally, understanding the cue-routine-reward loop is fundamental. Every habit, good or bad, follows this pattern. A cue (e.g., seeing a notification on your phone) triggers a routine (e.g., checking social media), which then provides a reward (e.g., a fleeting sense of connection or distraction). To form a new habit, you need to identify a clear cue, establish a new routine, and ensure that the routine provides a satisfying reward. Conversely, to break a bad habit, you need to disrupt this loop by either avoiding the cue, changing the routine, or finding an alternative, healthier reward.
Now that we understand the science behind habits and the role mindset plays, how do we put it all into action? Let’s break it down into clear, manageable takeaways.
11 Tips for Sustainable Habit Change:
Start Small: Don't try to overhaul your entire life overnight. Identify one small, manageable habit (behavioral, emotional, or thought-based) to focus on at a time. Small wins build confidence and momentum and we usually fail to “score” when we’re focused on more than one goal... so pick one… and only one goal!
Ditch the 21-Day Myth: Be patient with yourself. Understand that habit formation is a marathon, not a sprint. The average is 66 days, but your journey might be shorter or longer. Know that you’ve got to commit to something and it will take time!
Be Specific and Define Your Habit: Vague goals lead to vague results. Instead of "exercise more," aim to "walk for 30 minutes at 7 AM every weekday." The more precise you are, the easier it is to track and execute (and the easier it is for your brain to know what to do when you’re tired).
Identify Your Cues: What triggers your current habits (good and bad)? For example, are you bored and reaching for the Doritos? Once you understand your cues, you can strategically design your environment to make good habits easier to start and bad habits harder to perform.
Make It Easy (and Obvious): Reduce friction. If you want to drink more water, keep a water bottle within reach. If you want to read, keep a book by your couch. Make the desired behavior the path of least resistance.
Find Your Reward: What's in it for you? The immediate satisfaction of a habit reinforces the behavior. It doesn't have to be grand; it could be a feeling of accomplishment, a few minutes of quiet, or even a small, healthy treat. Your brain needs to feel good to want to do good!
Track Your Progress (Visually!): Seeing your progress can be incredibly motivating. Use a habit tracker app, a simple calendar with checkmarks, or a journal to visually record your consistent efforts. There is a reason we do this for kids each day!
Be Flexible: There will be days you miss. Don't let a single slip-up derail your entire progress. Give yourself a break, understand why it happened, and get back on track the very next day. The "never miss twice" rule is very powerful (Clear, 2018, p. 166).
Accountability is Your Ally: Share your goals with a trusted friend, join a community, or consider working with a coach. External accountability provides a powerful push when your internal motivation wavers.
Be Mindful of Your Thoughts and Feelings: Don't just focus on external actions. Pay attention to your internal dialogue and emotional patterns. Challenge negative thoughts and consciously cultivate positive ones. This is often the deepest and most impactful level of habit change.
Celebrate Small Victories: Acknowledge your efforts and celebrate when you consistently show up. Reinforcing positive behavior through celebration strengthens the habit loop and keeps you motivated for the long haul.
As we’ve described, it takes real intention, dedication and work (i.e. mindwork) to shift your thoughts and feelings. As the renowned author and speaker Stephen Covey wisely put it, "Sow a thought, reap an action; sow an action, reap a habit; sow a habit, reap a character; sow a character, reap a destiny." This powerful quote reminds us that even our deepest character and future are rooted in the small, consistent patterns of our thoughts and actions (Covey, 1989). For more on how to identify and truly "break" those less-than-helpful habits, we love this article from James Clear on dissecting the bad habit loop and replacing old patterns with new, empowering ones.
So, what’s one small habit — whether it’s a thought, a feeling, or a behavior — that you want to shift? Pick one. Let’s go.
At MYNDY, our clients are tired. So we’ve built our programs with this in mind! We help members create new patterns of behavior, feelings and thoughts — and hold them accountable, daily. This work is hard to do alone. We’re here to help you however we can!